Author: Dave Pasquel

After living under a rock for nearly 25 years, Dave had his eyes opened wide to the world in 2010 after marrying his crazy cat lady wife. Intrigued by controversy, culture, lifestyle, current events and history, Dave has traveled to 41 states and a handful of foreign countries. Defined as ‘metro’ by his three kids, you will often find him cleaning the house instead of working out in the yard. In his spare time, Dave likes to write sappy love songs but will be the first to admit that he can’t carry a tune.

Damaged Goods

September 3, 2016October 6, 2018 Dave Pasquel

I am damaged goods. I am forever broken. I am beyond repair. That is my excuse. I have not known innocence. My parents were self-absorbed. They were strangers, they ignored me. I grew up alone, a defiant adolescent. Rejection, neglect, and disdain were normal. I sought comfort from strangers, substances, Read more

Naked Soul

August 10, 2016September 14, 2018 Dave Pasquel

When is the last time you were completely naked in front of someone? I’m not talking about being naked for sex. I’m not talking about your significant other catching a glimpse of you coming out of the shower. I’m talking about REAL nakedness. Have you been naked to the point where Read more

Hello! Is My Name OCDave?

May 20, 2016October 5, 2018 Dave Pasquel

It’s no secret that I’m married to a slob. Thankfully, my wife realizes this, admits to it, and (proudly) owns it. I knew this fact going in, so it wasn’t a surprise when we got married. Because I’m anti-slob. I began to work on my master plan of manipulation to Read more

Girly Feet

April 23, 2016September 12, 2018 Dave Pasquel

If you really want to insult me, the worst thing you could possibly do is compliment my bare feet. In fact, I would rather you point, laugh and make fun of them because that’s what I typically do. You see, I have the most beautiful, dainty, smoothest, girly feet you’ve ever Read more

I am a Counterfeit Memory Hero

March 30, 2016March 20, 2020 Dave Pasquel

As I turned on the light and maneuvered my way into the closet, I made full use of my Tetris skills. I shuffled past boxes of record albums, computer parts and dozens of other boxes of unrecognizable junk and crammed my way to the very back. After much sweating, swearing, Read more

A Blurry Image of Love, Lust and the Teenage Mind

March 26, 2016September 12, 2018 Dave Pasquel

Love, lust and the teenage mind. Yep, I was a hot mess back in high school. I remember it vividly. Although I considered myself a goober, I sort of fit into almost every social group – including the “sportos, motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, and dickheads.” For some reason, Read more

“Hey Dude, Your Junk Looks Dangerous!”

February 16, 2016September 14, 2018 Dave Pasquel

I hate using the public restroom at the airport. Whether it’s the urinal or the stall, no amount of hand-washing is enough to satisfy my germaphobia. However, after traveling nearly every week for the past ten years, I’ve been forced to give in to nature’s whims – but only in dire emergencies. After all, Read more

After 35 Years, I Finally Grew a Pair

February 9, 2015October 3, 2018 Dave Pasquel

After 35 years, I finally grew a pair. That’s right, I finally stood up to a childhood bully. The end result of my adventure, however, is still quite a shock. Let me explain. I was bullied as a teenager as I grew up in a small town in New Jersey. Read more