Fathers

I give until I break
I keep trying even though my mother tells me to let go.

I thought I had you back
After 7 years of hopes crushed, self-esteem broken
I even tell you as much
But then you’re gone again

And my heart breaks in two just as it did when I was 10
I didn’t know it was coming then and I didn’t know now.

Except at 10 my heart was malleable and soft
Like greenstick fractures, my heart could mend
But now I’m 31 I’m not so sure
My walls are up, and the moat is deep
And my heart is brittle and bruised.

You just stood there.
Because that’s what you do so well
You do nothing to protect your daughters
Our long walks in parks and our emotional conversations in cars and on trains are null and void.

I will never be enough.

Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash

Written by 

Emily Frances Algar is a journalist and writer. She has experience in the music industry working as the A&R on the Grammy Nominated Album (Best Folk Album) Front Porch by artist Joy Williams. Emily has been published in a number of print and digital publications including Atwood Magazine, American Songwriter, and Record Collector magazine. She specializes in both long and short-form features as well as interviews and reviews. She has written pieces ranging from the commercialization of feminism and feminism in popular culture, critiques surrounding freedom of speech and the #MeToo movement as well as recently interviewing refugees from Iran. Emily has a Masters in International Security from Oxford Brookes University. Her thesis looked at the extent to which the media shaped public opinion during the Vietnam and Iraq (2003) wars.

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