Lawd, Have Mercy, the Kids are Divorcing

Since we do not live in the Land of Nirvana, from time to time, one of our adult children will get a divorce. In a perfect world, all matters will be handled with civility, and we will continue to have nice family dinners during the holidays. THEN YOU WAKE UP!

When the plans that your children make begin to melt away, it is a hard thing to watch and not say something. Quite often you might find yourself caught in the middle of a lot of “Who Shot John?” Take it from me; learn to draw your line in the sand early. Remember, there are always three sides to every story, their two sides and the truth.

If there are grandchildren and usually there are, the matter becomes even more complicated. I often text my older grandson who is swimming in the middle of all this muck and mire and encourage him to focus on his studies and college and to remember that I love him so much. I encourage my two younger ones to remember that they have just one job, to focus on school. I mentioned this once to my seven-year-old grandson and his response that his number one job was to go between his mother and his father’s homes. It was both cute and sad to hear.

It is important that we try to help the children maintain balance during this time. Encourage all involved that the shadows of our life are often caused by us standing in our own sunshine.

Photo Credit: Piero Tranchida via Compfight cc

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Beatrice Bailey was born and raised in Davenport, Iowa to a Baptist minister father and a mother who was a gospel recording artist. She has three sisters and one brother. She attended the University of Iowa and graduated with a BA in Psychology from California State University, Sacramento. Retired since 2004 from management positions with both the Xerox Corporation and the State of California, Bea now conducts customized seminars on “Budgeting for the Not So Rich and Famous”, “Putting the Puzzle Pieces Together…The Ultimate Balancing Act,” as well as interview techniques entitled, “Selling the Sizzle and Not the Steak.” In addition, she is an active member of St. Paul Baptist Church in Sacramento, CA, where she is an Adult Sunday School teacher. Bea has been a Head Feature Writer for Senior Magazine of Northern California. She also writes a monthly newspaper column entitled, “Uniquely Bea” Currently, she has authored a best-selling book, entitled, "Farewell, My Friend” and is conducting presentations and book signings throughout the United States and Mexico. "Radio Luz,” a Spanish Speaking Christian Radio Station, has interviewed her multiple times. Bea also was selected to be included in a book by The Author’s Show, as one of the "50 Outstanding Writers You Should Be Reading”. Bea has produced and hosted a new innovative television show, “A-Z with Bea”, which aired in November 2009 on RCCTV, Sacramento, CA. Bea is active at St. Paul Baptist Church and is an Adult Sunday school Teacher, and a Small Accountability Group Leader. She is a member of Kaiser’s Bio-Ethics Committee and on the Board of Advisors for the East Lawn Corporation. Recently, she has been asked to participate as a speaker with the Black Health Today national organization. To relax, Bea likes to work out at the gym, walk, knit, paint, sew, cook, garden, and read. Traveling within the United States, Mexico, Asia, the Caribbean, South America and Europe is one of Bea’s true passions. She has two adult children, one “bonus son”, five wonderful grandchildren and two great-grandchildren. She resides in Northern California.

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