Someday Someway

If someone should ask
what is a regret?
I would answer
truthfully and say
not mastering
how to stay.

I’ve pretended to sleep
with men who loved me
and some
I have loved back.
I do find myself
in spite of myself
plotting
escape routes
instead of
savoring sweet dreams.

A man
once dubbed me
uncontainable.
I thought it was banter
and laughed.
Instead it became
an anthem
a self-fulfilling prophecy.

It may be a defense
a fear of being left first
or perhaps
I’m a chimera
in disguise.

But please
don’t misunderstand
I have not canceled
chasing my happily ever after.
Instead of passages out
I’ll soon be planning ways to stay.

“If you can’t tell me what you need
All I can do is wonder why
Someday, someway
Maybe I’ll understand you”
–Marshall Crenshaw

Photo Credit: The Urban Scot Flickr via Compfight cc

Written by 

Dori Owen is a storyteller, writing from small town Arizona, after living a few decades in California as an LA Wild Child, with a brief stop in Reno. She settled into grownup life as a project manager, collecting an MBA and a few husbands along the way. She is a shown artist and her favorite pastime is upcycling old furniture and decor she finds from thrift stores. She lives with the cat who came to visit but stayed. The love of her life is her grown son who lives in Portland, Oregon. Her essays and poems have been published in RAW&UNFILTERED VOL I, StigmaFighters Vol 2, and Love Notes From Humanity. Her blogs have been featured on The Lithium Chronicles, Open Thought Vortex, Sudden Denouement, and The Mighty.

12 thoughts on “Someday Someway

  1. I’m a runner, I can so relate. Beautiful, Dori.
    I love this passage
    “But please
    don’t misunderstand
    I have not canceled
    chasing my happily ever after.
    Instead of passages out
    I’ll soon be planning ways to stay.”

    Someday. Xo

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